I felt pretty sorry for myself this week! I thought I was doing good and being positive. And in some ways, I am proud that I didn’t scream into the mountain this week. Not that anyone could hear me!
The mud is certainly challenging. Especially if you don’t have electricity! I am learning so much from my years of watching Little House On The Prairie. That’s for sure. But I think they had it a little more luxurious.
Feeling sorry for yourself is easy to do in any situation. And you can keep living the same day over and over when you keep thinking the same thoughts over and over. I have been trying to pay more attention to my thoughts. And to tell myself that I can do this. When I start thinking I can’t, I remember how much Brickle gave to be here. I have to keep trying. And by trying, I mean getting things more livable. It has to be. It has to be.
This week, we decided that in addition to getting some basic plumbing fixed, we had to think beyond ourselves and build a bag house. Because the cantina will be shut when they come back. And they were here before us. It’s our duty to do this. So instead of more supplies, tomorrow, we will try and find some wood. Then, this morning, we found a dead mouse who had not made it thru the rain. And now…mouse house? I have no doubt my prayers to know how to help the animals and wildlife here are being answered with direction. It’s for a bigger calling we are here than just fixing a forgotten house. And I think…if I don’t give up…we will find out what we need to do. Now, I just need to find the strength to take on more writing jobs and other means. I am woman. I am strong. I am able and I will do this.
-Rachael
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